2019 has probably been one of the
worst years in my life
OR
The best thing that could have
happened to me if I want to look at "the positives that come out from
every bad situation" Them whole 2019 year has had a lot of positives.
LOL
Everything it has taught me is
probably things that most people already know about but the difference here is
between reading it somewhere and me experiencing it.
Anyway, a few highlights to ponder
over
#Be present in the moment
This
is something that most people these days do not even realise that they are not
present in the moment. Surfing on your mobile while sitting at a restaurant
with someone is the obvious type of guess that would come to mind to most but
if you look deeper into this, when was the last time you experienced something.
Like do you remember what your toothpaste tasted like today? or what is the
smell that is currently around you? Can you sense the temperature around you
(before you read this) It is said that more present you are with everything you
do the better life gets, well let's see if I can even master a little bit of
this, being conscience that you are not present is I guess one step closer to
actually being present and hopefully soon master some of the art at least soon.
#People will judge you no
matter what.
This is something all humans do,
you will be judged by your friends, family, loved ones, colleagues and even the
random people you don't know. Just the fact that they have an opinion about
anything and everything is enough to have judgment passed.
The eye-opener for me especially
this year was most of the judgments passed were not based on what actually
happed but probably something that the other person experienced themselves or
what they think that society deemed right. It only later that I realized that
most of the judgments were their shortcomings or to put it, in other words, experiences and reactions from their past towards the situation and if only
they saw the mirror in each case they would know for sure. I too may have been
biased in some situations unknowingly but at least I would like to believe that
I am always open to listening to the other side of the story.
#Most people will jump to
conclusions without knowing the whole story.
Something similar to above. This
has happened to me both personally and professionally in very big events this
year. Probably this has happened in the past as well but what was different
about me this year was the lack of will to fight and prove to the other person
that they had read the whole thing from just one perspective. In both the
events that happened, I offered and probably insisted as well that they listen
to what I had to say. In the end, those people had already made up their minds
and passed on judgment and a sentence even before anything I had to say was
heard. I think a fair listening is a must anywhere, then to each their own to
make their own opinion. Lesson from this is there are always two sides to the
story, so next time someone talks about a person be not in a rush to judge till
you have heard the other side to the story. Anyway, I decided that I will let
Karma deal with all of them, my conscience is clear.
#Do not depend on others to
make you happy.
This is one of the most difficult
ones for me to learn. For those who know me, I am a peoples person and I love
having people around with me to share in the experiences be it good or bad. My
problem of being emotionally dependant on one or a few has let me down big time
especially this year. Do I know how to be happy by myself, well not yet which is
funny cause someone told me I was a selfish person and only thought of myself.
I guess they did not know the difference between self-care and selfishness or
maybe I don't.
#You can't force people to love you
The statement says it all, you
might give it your all but if the other person does not care then you can keep
trying but they will never see the love that you have for them. In fact, to the contrary, they will see negatives in even the things that were once loved by them. While
it probably hurts when your there in that situation but trust me, in the long
run, it's their loss.
#7star holidays mean nothing
without your loved ones
Well,
a 7 star might be better than 5 star better than a 3 star but if the holiday is
a lonely one and no one to share the moments with then those stars count as
nothing compared to the times spent with people who love you. At the end of the
day, all that you will be left with is memories and nothing else. Like I said
earlier I still need to figure how to be happy by myself so maybe this might
change once that does.
#Sharing your problems can lessen the burden
A lot and I really mean a lot of
people came to my rescue this year, taking precious time out of their lives to
listen to me, if not for that I am not sure where I would have been this year.
I thank God and may he bless all of them with his abundance.
People also say "keep your
problems to yourself" but honestly, if you have nothing to hide it should
not matter what people say or think. People who matter will help no matter what
even if it's just giving a listening ear. I have also come across so many
people this year who were in a similar situation, some even in worse states and
speaking to all its very clear, its ok to ask for help and even seek
professional help.
#Remember the people who took time out to help you.
This is an obvious one, when you
are down think of all the people who took their time out to meet you, speak
with you, advise you or just be there for you. These are your true friends. The
more successful you get more people will make time for you. That is purely out
of their needs and not you.
#Social media is a complete waste of time.
Gained absolutely nothing from
social media except that the whole world has gone crazy and everyone is out to
get each other. Switch off all social media for a week and you will know what I
mean. I am not 100% off it but I can say usage had come down quite
dramatically.
# Don’t trust people who post too much or
nothing on social media
Not
sure if "don't trust" is the right word for it or just be vary of
them. The ones who overpost, I feel are really lacking something real in their
lives, so are looking for appreciation from strangers about their filter filled
lives. And the ones who do not post anything really want to keep super reserved
lives, I respect that too but it does make me doubt why nothing at all? I am
sure there is something that you can share with the rest of the world once in a
way.
# Don’t trust people who
have nothing on their personal phones/laptops.
Be very careful of people who delete all messages and clean their
browsers every few minutes they always have something to hide. I am not one who
recommends snooping on your partner's, colleagues or friend's phone but if you
think about it you only have to keep deleting things if you have something to
hide.
#The past is the past be
it positive or negative
Another
statement that gets thrown around so often. We are who we are today because of
our past and how we have reacted to it. A person who goes through a bad event
will feel the same thing coming at even the smallest of signs that were similar
to that bad event and would have their defenses up immediately. It is how and
why we judge others, there is no way around it than to be aware the not all
similar situations are the same. This comes back to point one where you
need to be present in the moment, each day is new one and each experience can
be a new one only if you let it.
#Do not change for anyone except yourself
Last but not the least, we all grow
through life and you will change no matter if you can accept it or not or if
you can even observe it or not. Our core beings, however, stay the same and
changing your likes or belief’s for someone else does not always end up well.
Change only if you want to change and you feel good and positive about the
change. If not its not worth losing who you are in the long run.
Here is saying good bye to 2019 and
hoping for a positive and fun-filled 2020. The teen's are done, welcome to the
youth.
